The marvelous world of josh!

taggedy tag tag

2007-06-10T04:12:00.000+08:00

i got a taggg.. and somehow, i'm happy! better than blogging bout myself for sure..

5 THINGS I FOUND IN MY BAG;
(ok first of all, i dont really have a 'bag'.. and the closest thing to one is in melaka.. but i'll imagine :P)
- story books (alice in wonderland, dracula, hans christian anderson compilations)
- snacks
- my trusty tortex pick
- my beloved mp3 player
- some notes from uni which i forgot to get rid of

5 THINGS I FOUND IN MY WALLET
(ok, this, i can do..)
- imaginary dollars
- ic
- lesen
- student card
- memories

5 FAVOURITE THINGS IN MY ROOM
(again, i dont really spend much time in my room, besides sleeping.. so i'll take the pc room instead)
- Penny (my beloved SX explorer)
- Jo (my beloved yamaha pacifica)
- my 'never failed me and hopefully will not decide to do so' pc
- my lovely 2.1 altecs
- the strategic positioning (great view of the hall/tv, less than 5 steps to the fridge)

5 THINGS I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO
- perform in front of tens of thousands
- the thousands be chanting 'diphthong' (this is a big one, so it takes to spots :P)
- own a skyline GT-R34
- re-live the fondest memories of my life again, and again
- be content

5 THINGS I'M CURRENTLY INTO
- Buckethead
- certain forms of metalcore
- reverb n chorus and delay, at the same time :P
- Anna Molly
- living and letting live

5 PEOPLE I TAG
- No one!! whooopeee!!

signing off,
JOSH!

The Ultimate curry capacitors..

2007-05-31T03:28:00.000+08:00

Tou fu my friends, is what i'd like to call the curry capacitor.. u know, those spongy kinda toufu.. amazing.. hahaha.. stuff a couple of those into ur fish curry n u've got urself a miracle of the mouth just waiting to happen! Anyways, back to more boring stuff, my life! I'm on holidays now! for three weeks as always.. my foundation is over! well at least i hope it is, supps would be a big bummer.. so next is, mechanics! here i come mutha fucka!

On a less educational note, i have finally obtained (and installed) the pleasant services of an EMG pickup, which currently resides in the bowels of my sx explorer, dearest penny.. it sounds as it should, fucking awesome! and its definitely 300+ bucks well spent!

I also realised that my blog lacks a certain visual attraction, so here, to help a lil wit that, are some random pictures! enjoy!

there is it, the 85!

people, on one of those genting cable cars

Thats me, high, as u can see..

Thats all folks!

signing off,

JOSH!

IIIIIIIIIIIIII... wish i was here.

2007-04-14T01:41:00.000+08:00

sorry people! i've had neither the time nor feeling to string a few sentences to keep thiss page fresh.. but lucky u! i'm back home n don't have a thing in the world to do.. did u miss me??? if u didn't, here's a nice tip, ALT+F4. If ur one of those people who have been spamming my comment board with gay porn links.. sorry, i'm straight.. whatever preference u are, pls, u don't need to share it with me.. co-op is much appreciated. =)

So, wats been up, Joshua? oh well nothing out of this world, been coping with uni, been having quite a number of assignments, with the occasional serving of mid terms. besides that, been having a blast the past few weeks back home. i shall spare u the details. Anyways, just wanted to keep this page fresh.. dont really have anything monumental to say.. so G'nites!

Signing off,
JOSH!

And it always been about the innocent..

2006-12-31T01:55:00.000+08:00

I woke up to hear Saddam Hussein, one of the worlds most recognizable figures, was executed. Now i know, he may have led huge wars which brought great suffering to countless people, but he too is a man. I can safely say he deserved a lifetime in prison, or something of that sort, but to be executed? And it seems to be that most world leaders are encouraging such acts of overwhelming power. I know we've reached an all time low in humanity when a leader of a country says an execution is to be a 'turning point of better things to come'. And to make things better, the whole execution was recorded on video! Can't the just let the man pass in peace?? This is why i do not bother myself in the ongoings of the world.
I'd much rather live in my little world of complete oblivion, of innocence, my wonderland. That's another reason why I love the book so much. It's a journey of a little innocent girl through the wonderland of her mind, making her own logic of the 'adult' things she cant seem to comprehend. She lived her life how a kid should. and honestly, how everyone else should too. I dont find any reason why everyone should leave their childhoods in the past along with the blissful innocence thats comes with it. i certainly have no intention of doing so.
I honestly think people who lose the child in them, find it harder to be happy. and it makes sense as well; with the reality of logic bright in the minds of adults, imagination has little space to work its magic and with foresight looming over, contentful lives seems logically impossible. thus arises the need for external methods to happiness. Intoxication, sexual pleasures, and such only prove to be temporary, and without, happiness is naught. whereas in the colourful smiles of a child, anything and everything is fine. nothing is there to worry about and u dont need help to feel content with everything.
But of course, without adulthood responsibilities, the blissful innocent kids wouldnt have food on their plates, toy in their baskets, smiles on their faces... so adulthood too does play its part in the whole game.. with that said, balance is what we should find. so no matter how the years pass us by, we will stand strong still by the bright and burning flame of youthfulness. Age is but a number, life is but a dream.

Signing off,
JOSH!
*perpetual smiles!*

twinkle twinkle little bat, how I wonder where u at..

2006-11-26T01:11:00.000+08:00

yeos! That was the theme of the day yesterday... what a day it was.. it started peacefully at around 9 in the morning in the tranquill of the University Green Apartments. As I slumberly dragged myself around the apartment trying to put together a decent enough face to attend class which started at 10. so with a bag full of clothes, and not even a scent of book, I entered class fashionably late, at 10.15. And by 11.05 i was already in full stride, to the dismay of many classmates, (away from the next lecture) galloping my way to the local bus stand. took the first bus that scratched my sight straight to melaka sentral. reached the indon-infested dump of a bus terminal at 11.55, ran around with my shoulder bag flailing wildly, looking for a twelve oclock bus back to kl. So finally, after almost forgetting my ticket at the counter, i caught a bus! And now i'm getting tired and lazy to fill u guys in.. so to cut thing short, reached subang bought guitar strings... one string broke.. went jamming followed by audition... made fools of ourselves with our just tea song... had a very interesting day all in all...

Signing off,
JOSH!

18 - 5 = KABOOOMMM!!!!!

2006-11-18T00:41:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHELLE!!!!

hehe.. sorry i couldnt get this posted any earlier but.. i din have the chance to use the pc. so here it is! 3 days late but not any less heart in it k...

Signing off,
JOSH!

May you find... some comfort here.

2006-11-12T01:34:00.000+08:00

Listening to Sarah Mclachlan.. i like her voice. so much emotion to it.. and she has that distinct haunting aura about it.. plus her songs aren't half bad as well! hahaha...

I've recently been trying my best to explore other vistas in the wide wide world of music... trying out different artist that i dont usually listen to.. or just looking at the songs i already have on my playlist in different angles.. for example, i downloaded a couple of 'radiohead' songs today.. just to try and get the whole feel of their music.. and try to understand the big fuss ppl make of their music.. with songmeanings.net prominently flashing on my monitor, i took upon myself the task at hand.. with radiohead running through my head.. i ploughed through the lyrics.. following each and every note, every change in the tune, every moan sung.. only to find myself at the same place i started.. no eye opening experience, no new found respect for radiohead, no nothing... they're still the same 'wats the big hype bout?' band to me.

Two bands that have caught my eye (or ear to be exact) during my soul searching quest for more music, on the other hand, are the stereophonics and blur. Now i'm not saying that these 2 bands have made it to my permanent playlist. Just one or two songs that have been in my head... actually more like one song from each band.. 'Mr.writer' by the stereophonics and 'good song' by blur are definitely songs u should check out.. both pretty slow paced songs.. very dark melodies they have.. but in very subtle ways.. u dont hear it, but feel it.. that kinda thing.

Anyways, i feel, although slowly, i've been surely diversifying my palette.. its a good thing i feel.. hopefully this can open up the musician in me.. as i deem necessary..only time knows the outcome of that mystery.

Signing off,
JOSH!

An insane love now burns above..

2006-11-10T00:54:00.000+08:00

An insane love now burns above,
The weft of incandescent stars,

Hilt your dripping fangs that range,
skywards to rend apart,
I might have sang of wings unchained,
But long before i locked my heart,

For gabrielle...

Ah.. I wish i wrote those lines... actually i wish i wrote all of Dani's lyrics... damn that man can write good... i wish i could... guess i aint got the talent for it.. like how i lack the talent to string even the simplest of harmonies together.. and how i lack the talent to carry conversations which are of any interest to anyone... and how i fall short of glory in just about everything else i venture in... i guess i'm just about talent-less... jack of all trades, master of none... and yet, after all these years... i'm still, and have been for a long time, content with life... i guess talents dont really matter in a world like mine... i just go on doing the talent-less things i have been doin all this while.. and my friends are still there, even with all the shortcomings.. like i said, talents dont really matter in a world like mine..
Do they matter in yours?.. think about it..

Signing off,
JOSH!

Peace Through Superior Firepower

2006-10-18T14:19:00.000+08:00

Thats my theme for the week. i just got two new DVDs courtesy of The Ian Nathan corporation. Both, by Cradle of filth, and both, kick ass! many thanks go out to The Ian Nathan corp. A great many things of both good and un-good have been-a-happening recently.. well i shall stress on the good. as its the part which i like more. firstly, I now, enjoy a three week break from the tortures of exile in Melaka; as the my first semester has come to a close. That's one down, fourteen to go! *clap* *clap* ok moving on, i have recently obtained, through the ever dependable sources of pirates, two very new, very 'ownage' albums. First, presenting the master class of brit extreme heavy metal, Cradle of Fitlh!! with their latest excretion, Thornography. and secondly, the fathers of doom metal themselves, My Dying Bride!! with newest piece of art, A Line of Deathless Kings. ok ok, quick reviews!

Cradle of Filth's thornography:
This album kicks some serious ass!! ownage to the power of ten!! I first had a taste of things to come when 2 singles were released, Dirge Inferno and The Foetus of A New Day Kicking. Both extremely trashy, the way I like it, both fast paced, and both, surprisingly good! that just pushed my anticipation over the top! and when i finally got my hand on the rest of the goods I was pleasantly surprised as it didnt dissappoint. the whole album, with the exception of a few low notes, IS AWESOME!!! i've had it on repeat ever since.

My Dying Bride's A Line of Deathless Kings:
Upon first recieving news of my dying bride releasing a new one, I was estatic! but then, i got hold of their single from the album, 'deeper down' the song was named, and fittingly so, as at that time I felt My Dying Bride were just heading 'deeper down'.. but then i got the rest of the album.. and thank the heavens, there is some good stuff in it! but I do have to stress that not all of the album was up to my liking so it kinda falls short of the cradle of filth praise.. bout half the album is on repeat now, the other half will just have to wait for better days. sorry. but definitely, My Dying Bride are stlil going strong.

There is ONE more album which is out in the market already, I'm just waiting till I get the official merchandise in my hands before I say more. so to sum it up, musically, life has never been better.

Signing off,
JOSH!

Rose of May, lay withered upon cold bite of September...

2006-09-23T03:03:00.000+08:00

The nightingale sang a song of love,
Of love so pure, so true, so right,
With love itself gave in crimson sacrifice,
And there it stood a rose of perfect cloves.

A rose which lit with burning ember,
And sparked new life in the heart of a poor,
dismayed young child of science and gave,
hope n faith, even though scarce, to have.

Then along came frost of hard september,
And with its smite the flame to fade,
hand in hand they withered and bade,
farewell, in hope and faith i'll remember.

The Rose of May, lay withered upon the cold bite of september...

You are heaven sent...

2006-09-09T04:43:00.000+08:00

yello! gua sudah balik yall.. and now again, feast on one of the great literary works of our time.. Joshua's blog! yay! hahahaha.

Some things never change.. a lot of people have told me, thank happen to be in those numbers... and i think because of that, i've come to think so as well.. well for the most part at least.. i've been the same ol' joshua everyone has come to know and love. but is that a good thing? could it be that the good things in life never change? or are they just too plain to even imagine them otherwise.. i prefer to believe the first.. sometimes, i just dont see the need for change, when everything is perfect, so complete.. y change it?... thats just being itchy-fied... but on the other hand, some may argue that change can bring for the better... can it?... in some cases, the very few, yea.. it can.. for a while.. then u start missing the old stuff.. the good old days... then it starts to turn sour.. then u wish and pray for it all to go back to how it used to be.. but it'll never happen... and eventually u'll just jump on another new thing and the cycle goes on....

now i know, this isnt the case for some..and to some, change actually does bring betterment in life... and they look back at the good ol' days.. and smile, knowing they went down the right path... and that the choices, the changes, made things a lil more enjoyable... and a whole lot more meaningful... to these, blessed few, choice and change bring always a new adventure just waiting to be adventured... and for the rest of the population, its another bump on the road... slows us down, keeps us focused, gets us off our seats and always uncomfortable....

...and yet, itsn't it the spice of life? good or bad, i'll take what comes my way... like i've always said, " makes life more interesting what.."

signing off,
Josh!

Let's jam all our blues away..

2006-09-02T21:30:00.000+08:00

hehe, I'm back! terribly sorry for the constant neglect i shower upon the faithfuls. boo hoo! anyways. let's get goin wit my life. hahaha.. well for starters, i'm back in subang! and.. i went jamming today! yay! hahaha.. i miss jamming so much... been more than a month since i last struck a note with diphthong.. until earlier today that is.. hahaha..

Good news has been popping up all around me these past few days... first i found out iron maidens album is out.. then i hear cradle of filth's new album is on its way... this october.. then, i hear 'saw 3' will be out in october as well... and, to top it all off, My Dying bride's new album is comin out in october too!!! october is definitely a month to look forward to.. plus my sem break is in october as well... the only problem is, its a good month away.. thats looong...

Life's getting terribly repetitive nowadays.. gotta find something to spice it up a lil.. amazingly uni life is getting old very fast.. maybe next sem will be better..

there's no place like home...

Signing off,
JOSH!

bubbles..

2006-08-14T20:22:00.000+08:00

I saw bubbles fall from the sky today...
...and I thought of you...

I saw the child who was blowing them from his apartment balcony....
...and I thought of you..

Signing off,
JOSH!

The Marvelous World of Josh!

2006-08-12T22:59:00.000+08:00

It's been a week already!! Fuck time.. why does it have to fly so fast... my one week mid semester break is comin to an end tomorrow.. i'll be heading back to malacca..again.. when i really dont want to..again.. sometimes i just feel like quitting and picking up something around here.. but then my shoulders get heavy, pictures of my parents flash by.. and then i realise.. i do it for them. aih.. such a responsible son i am.. :) Joshua hates leaving subang.. for one reason and one reason only. u should know by now. muahahaha!!

On a brighter note, Josh has been upgraded. went for the PIKOM PC Fair yesterday... it was cool.. got to drool at the dual core..that is what i call some good shit.. oh and i got myself an MP3 player!! yessshhh!!! i've wanted one like forever... and now i got one!!! imagine.. i can listen to my music... anytime i want!!!! its also a thumbdrive... thats how i convinced my dad to actually get it...hehehe.. which of course will come in handy at uni... but most of all it keeps me in my world... MINE!!! muahahaha!!!! so people pls pray for me... i really have no clue how i'm gonna get through the next 5 years... guidance is dearly needed...

Signing off,
JOSH!

ahh! My first tag! woot!!!

2006-08-07T14:12:00.000+08:00

1) Four things not many know
Joshua likes sarah mclachlan
Joshua has not been to sunway lagoon since he was in kindy.
Joshua loves digimon and still plays it on his ps.
Finger nails grow at an average rate of 0.1mm a day.

2) Four movies I could watch over and over.
Metallica, live shit binge and purge 89' seattle
Blue streak
The fast and the furious, Tokyo drift
The Lion King

3) Four places I have lived.
My grans in SS3 pj
Ithaca, New York
USJ 2 subang jaya
University green apartments, malacca

4)Four TV shows I love to watch.
The simpsons
Everybody loves raymond
all the other junk....

5) Four places I have been on vacation.
Penang
malacca...ironic..
P.pangkor
P.langkawi

7) Four of my favourite foods.
meat
meat with stuff
meat by itself
meat on a stick

8) Four places I would rather be
at asia cafe
jamming
singapore
home.

9 )Four fave songs
Master of puppets
Little Wing
Cthulhu Dawn
One

10) Four people i tag
Yue
AllieM
Mich
Boss

Missing her eyes, it's always penny and me tonight...

2006-07-23T00:12:00.000+08:00

Aluuu! hehe.. Josh is back in subang and he's back bloggin! hurrah!... so, whats been happening? Well, first of all... i've been in melaka for the past 2 weeks, so sorry for not keeping this dump up-to-date.... life, for the past 2 weeks, have been very 'interesting'... not great, not bad... but FUCKED UP!!!! dont ask y... it just was... well the first week was survive-able.. the weekend was amazing...and everything after 3 o'clock on sunday afternoon was plain shit... nothing but shit. Need I explain? ok i will either way, it all started on friday.. when the best thing that could ever happen to me in melaka, actually happened! Jo came over! she n her sis n her friend joined this 'spirit of melaka' thingy.. so she put up at my place for the weekend with daniel, another dude. ever since then everything was just plain awesome... it was all i've been ever asking for, since the day i went to that God forsaken state. so anyway, the next 2 days went by with bliss n nothing else... and then sunday came... then good ol' mr. heavy heart came to visit me... n he put on a few pounds since the last time we met... so that was it... the following week went by with nothing but 'miss-ness' (if u know what i mean). thank goodness baby kallen was there to keep me sane.. i dont know how i could ever survive in melaka without her...

so that's it! i'm back now, in the dear company of my beloved friends.. smiling once again.. got 2 weeks till the mid sem break.. so lets hope they fly by...

signing off,
JOSH!

In my place, in my place.. oh yeah...

2006-07-02T21:09:00.000+08:00

Forgive me for i havent been updating this page.. but i've been through some busy times and some uncomfortable ones as well... well firstly, i've been mightly busy trying to adapt to life in melaka, to life as a university student and as a social outcast. and for the latter part, i've been trying to blog for a few days already.. the first few attempts proved unsuccessful for no technical reasons whatsoever.. but for the reason that i just dont feel comfortable blogging from anywhere else either than my pc here at subang. I tried blogging from the uni com labs.. but i couldnt bring myself to it... so was scene at the cyber cafes as well.. i always guess those machines just dont cut it...well i guess it just HAS to be that i'm staring at MY monitor, typing on MY keyboard, listening to MY music and all in the comforts of home. also if u were wondering, yes, i now am in subang, at home, blogging just as i mentioned how.

Anyway, back to the matter of the day. Joshua's blog post. i'm already 2 weeks through my classes in MMU. i can feel life's pace beginning to pick up... assignments have kicked into gear and its school again, in full motion. its kinda refreshing honestly, after such a long time just lazing around brain dead.. i finally get the rusty thing up aand running again... happy to find it, albeit a little sketchy, still in relatively good working condition. I'm really enjoying lessons as its all in english and its by far simpler to understand. So to sum it up, academic side of life is all in order, for the time being. Things aren't really as sweet and blisfull on the social side. I'm trying to make new friends, something i haven't done properly since form three or four.. and it hasn't been a very fruitful venture as of yet. i'm the kinda guy who believes in that good ol' saying "having a few great friends is better than having lots of normal ones". I've been holding on to that saying, and my group of friends, for as long as i can remember. I still do believe so. That's probably the reason for the absence of a social life. I've already got a group of friends who i can confidently call brothers and sisters. So why the need for more? i know i will need to make friends in melaka someday... but its proving to be quite a task... So the surge will continue till it succeeds..
Today, that point of mine about the few good friends really came to life... today, i've felt more comfortable and i had more fun than i've had the whole past 2 weeks. Not forgetting yesterday and friday night as well... i'll be back next week!

P.S. A small favour i need from all of u people who check on this page regularly, could u just drop a comment?.. it can be anonymous if preferred but it would be nice if i knoew who i am writing for...i just wanna know if its worth maitaining..

Signing off,
JOSH!

There'll be sad songs, to make you cry..

2006-06-10T02:16:00.000+08:00

honest words make the best songs.

this song has been stuck in my mind since eddy mentioned it in the camp.. but the more i listen to it.. the more beautiful it becomes...

I always stop and think of you especially,
When the words of love song,
touch the very heart of me.
There'll be sad songs to make you cry,
love songs often do,
They can touch the heart of someone new,
saying I love you, I love you.

honest words make the best songs.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

ok now i got that off my chest, its time to get into the actual blogging for the day. Yue says my blog has been awfully stagnant in recent days.. i guess thats pretty much true. I've just got a lotta stuff on my mind n kinda wanted to get them settled down before i began to jot them down. The next stage of my life is beginning tomorrow, i will now start a whole new chapter, University life. tomorrow i leave for malacca for good, my apartment is all booked, uni forms all filled. the only thing that remains is for me to say goodbye to the previous chapter.... to say goodbye... i love this time in my life... this exact moment, its the kinda time when ur standing on a mountain peak.. looking at the path u've taken, smiling, then looking at the long trecherous path ahead, smiling still. The road so far has been, for the msot part, smooth sailing. I've been living what some would call the good life... and i'm very thankful for being blessed with wonderful people around me, who make such a life possible.. not forgetting a 'couldn't care less' mind which helps loads getting through the rough patches. I do hope my presence, though significantly absent, will still be felt in my people. There's nothing any man hates more than being forgotten..... being forgotten.... i remeber in the beginning of form 4, when my class teacher Pn.Shanta asked us to fill up our ambitions in a form... on the top of my list was to be a legend... to be remembered. They say its in the bones of every man it is, to be remembered. i just hope i will. i've obviously gotta thank God for making this far, and this sucessful. (if any beg to differ, do contact me:) He means the world to me, His creation mean the world to me. This is how He blessed me. He did, honestly, give me life in all its abundance. As He once promised. my parents, family and most of all my friends... they mean more to me than life itself ever could... each and every one of them.(u know who u are). you guys will be dearly missed.
now its not that i'm goin away forever or somethin neither am I becoming emo or anythin... i just like to take opportunities like this to express myself... dont get to do it very often. LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!

p.s. u've always got a friend in me, not matter how distant you may feel to others, or even if they turn their back against you, abandon you, curse you... stand proud! cuz u've got josh! and forever u will have him... and he will always have u in his heart... now thats more than you'll ever need. :)

p.p.s.s. i almost teared when i opened the lil letter u gave me...love it lots, love u more, love u too much.

Josh is too emo to sign out. bless him.

endless tears, for my endless dear...

2006-05-24T00:01:00.000+08:00

Joshua is slightly on the emo side today. You wanna know why? Are u sure u wanna know? well even if you don't want to know, i'll tell you. Because it's my blog! Live with it!
Anyway, the story goes like this, about half an hour ago, i opened my internet explorer(IE) browser. So, my home page, BBC.com opened up showing me all the up to date news from every corner of the globe. And under the 'entertainment' portion, a really interesting headline brought a tear to my eye (not literally). It read, '50 cent named songwriter of the year'. -_-... my immediate reaction was, 'HAHAHAHA.. this shits faulty, i'll just refresh the page'... so i did and it still was there... so i click on the link, bringing me to the whole story on 50 cents remarkable win.
ASCAP. The American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers. The IDIOTS!! who can actually even consider 50 cent as eligible for such an honourable and prestigious award. WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD THINK OF FREAKING 50 CENT AS SONGWRITER OF THE YEAR!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FREAKING HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!!!! ALL OF YOU!!!!!

this got me thinking, my goodness, todays music industry has really gone to the dumps... if the same people who come up with shit like:

You can find me in the club, bottle full of bub
Look mami I got the X if you into taking drugs
I'm into having sex, I ain't into making love
So come give me a hug if you into getting rubbed

can actually WIN an award for freaking songwriter of the year!!!! the last time i checked, music was about expression, about emotion, about passion, about music.... but what i see now is, music from being about love, it has become all about money. This article shows you all u need to know, for 'songwriter of the year', 50 cent really has his priorities set out. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/4813912.stm

A man once said, people like 50 cent deserves to be shot..if the 5 shots he already has isnt enought to put him to sleep, give him anouther 5!. I belive that man was me. please man, its killing my love, my dear... i know there are still honest musicians who do it from the heart... i could name a whole novel full... but the few that do it from the greed.. its homocide, plain killing.

I don't know how much more of this shit i can take... i'm off to play my guitar and listen to some proper music.. maybe it'll help calm me down...

signing off,
josh....

Forever young, i want to be forever young...

2006-05-21T23:10:00.000+08:00

*door opens*

WOOT!!!! Josh is here!!! hahaha.. yes thats right, joshua is back to blog on more of his daily swashbuckling, heel clicking, ass spanking, sweat dripping, meat eating adventures through life!
And todays adventure is, the family day jamboree! well this story actually begins on friday... n the afternoon i went to watch the Da Vinci code, with my lovely group of friends. the show was pretty cool in my opinion, it was pretty much like how i'd imagined it while i was reading the book. but nothing more. it wasnt awesome or marvelous... just good. well after the movie, went for a bite at good ol' 1901.Mmmm.... nothing like it.. :) well ok, so after biting 1901, rushed home n headed straight to church.. we had preparations to do! tons of work, not so many people... yay! more work for us! haha so after bout slugging it for 4 hours, it was complete.. all there was left to do was wait for the next day and hope that all went right with our clowns.
well the clowns were for our form 3 game stall...'whack the clowns' hehehe... so the basic idea was... stoning the clowns with soft rubber balls. OK! so the next day came, the big day, family day. Everything was just wonderful... a good few came out to help the stall... thanks! and everything went just alrite... loads of fun, n even Ju-Lien was there! so that day came and went... n it took a whole lot outta me... damn was i beat! and just to make things sweeter, Sunday came along! yeah, thats right, he just came along... strolling down the lanes.. cool.. and decides to stuff another load of work up my ass...* well not that i'm complaining ya... i love what i do *.... but yea... fatigue has grip his on me... and i dont think he's in the mood to let go... so sunday,today la, had church, sunday school, marco polo lunch, sketch practice and mamak... what a day...Thats what u call Joshua at maximum efficiency... hahahaha
Days are passing by at a blinding pace man, i wish i had more time around... how i wish i were young again... schooling... in form 3 maybe... without a care in the world but to irritate the teachers as much as possible... Joshua's getting too old for his childlike heart...

signing off,
JOSH!

If your not sure where your going, any road will get you there.

2006-05-13T01:35:00.000+08:00

I realized something, music makes my moods. What music i'm listening to, thats my mood at the time. I know, I know some of u will be goin "duh!! when ur sad u listen to sad songs!". but no no.. i meant it like this, when i listen to happy songs, i BECOME happy. listen to sad songs, i BECOME sad. music controls my moods. not that i have some kinda extreme dramatic moods la.. but just the way i think at the moment la. Why am I telling u all this? well there's a reason...hehehe... i wanted to promote some of the songs that i listen to. =)

so here, Joshua's current playlist.

The Cranberries - Zombie
- Salvation
- Animal Instinct

Jason Mraz - Wordplay
- Geek in the Pink
- The Remedy
- You and I both

Elvis Presley - suspicious minds

U2 - one

Micheal Jackson - Cry
(rockwell) - somebody's watching me

Cradle of Filth - Thank God for te Suffering

Korn - Word up

James Blunt - Goodbye My Lover

Bon Jovi - Livin on a prayer

Thats about it for now... when i do see some drastic changes to my list.. i will repost it.. hehehe...

Signing off,
JOSH!

Country road, take me home... the place where i belong

2006-05-11T02:33:00.000+08:00

it's two forty now, and i'm hungry. i'm sorry dear readers that i havent been keeping this fresh. i have no excuse but laze. ok. so now, what have I been doin.. well i just got back from melaka. that's something. i took a trip to melaka this monday to check out the apartments i'll be staying in. Emerald Park. nice name.. not so nice place. =)... ok well bukit beruang(the place in melaka where MMU is located) isnt the most exciting place in the world.. so i dont blame Emerald Park(EP). Its a very laid back town in melaka.. life moves slow there... except for the uni of course. i put up in my brother's room for the past two days and in return he showed me around. we like the give and take system. =)... so first things first, the lowdown on the place. i'll be staying in a twin sharing room... no attached bathroom... internet connection(YEAH!!).... basically its just a bed, closet and table. with walls all around. food is plentiful and affordable but doesnt make ur tastebuds go wild. there's burger stalls at night, which should cover my late nite suppers. there's a cyber cafe just across the road from the uni. =)... and the closest thing to a mall around here is jaya jusco which is about a ten minute drive from EP. doesnt bother me much anyway. oh yes, i forgot, it is in the delivery radius of both Mc Donalds and shakeys! woot!
So u must be thinking, its full steam ahead to melaka ain't it? hehe... sorry ya... tak kenal...

so here's the Joshua 'campus checklist':

Bed: check
Bathroom: check
Computer: check
Internet connection: check
If check, is it fast?: hell no!
If hell no, is there cc in area?: yes(check)
Food & Beverage: check
Leisure:- Pool: no check
Mamak: no check
Cinema: no check
Mall: no check
People:- Metal-heads: no check
Chicks: no check
Sane people: goin extinct(no check)
Estates: check
Kacats & lalas: occasional sightings(check)

There it is, so u see... the place may be alrite... but everything else is just depressing. hehehe... anyway, there's no turning back now. Yup, June 10th is the day. and the countdown starts now! 30 days.

on another note, i went for my driving undang kursus the other day, hehehe... thank God thats over. it was like hell decided to pay a five hour visit... Thank you satan. ;P

OH BTW! My church is having its annual family day this comin 20th. Do join in the festivities PLEAAASSEEEE!!!!! 10 to 2 *daytime* at the Lim Foo Yong hall in SS13. There's a car wash goin on... so bring ur vehicles!!

Signing off,
JOSH!

from the dancefloor to the graveyard..

2006-04-23T12:12:00.000+08:00

love would have conquered all,
were we not parted,
her splintered loss rekindles rage,
the winter frost dwindles across my stage,
lit up once more to score finales started.

love would have conquered all,
love would have conquered... hate. -thank God for the suffering

our rites of sin,
have long fathered a hymn,
to burden him,
whom by slip of after whim,
at genesis,
dressed her like the wind,
in autumn gowns,
that pinned her down,
to be my, be my mannequin. - mannequin

no more a victim of crusades,
where souls are strung from moral palissades,
i slit my wrist and quickly slip away,
i journey now on summerlands,
to grace her lips with contrabands,
the blaze once in my veins... - suicide and other comforts

have i ever told u how much i love cradle of filth? well i do, a lot. the short verses above kinda explain why.. i'm a sucker for good poetry... -_-"
not only that, the voice, the music, the whole athmosphere of their songs are just sooo seductive...

which brings me to my story for today. i love my music.. and occasionally i love to dance... and coincidently, most people dance to music! what a great idea that was, to bridge the arts together. anyway, i was at the samfest the other night and to my suprise i had my fair share of fun... but saying that, i've also had better dance nights... way better. but i have nothing against the organizers... they did a wonderful job to be honest.. it was just.. the crowd.. ugh..

thats the first part of my story. now after the samfest we, me yj ian chiew ngiek ben nick, decided to go to rainforest for a few friendly drinks... being the great friends they are. they decided to buy me a birthday cocktail.. GRAVEYARD... i choose you!

and then it came, in all its glory... that tall slender glass... so mildy frosted on the outside.. seductively black it stood, with straws standing tall, teasingly manipulated to form a cross.. with a crimson cherry at its intercept... calling my name, i couldnt resist but to indulge.. the first gulp.. it hit hard..and it burned.. and i loved it! passing it around.. so all had their taste of paradise.. and the rest was mine for the keeping.. hehehe... whats in a graveyard u might ask.. well so did i.. to one of the waiters.. and this is what he said, "ermm... gin, vodka, tequilla, white rum, and 3 other liquors.. topped off with half a glass of stout. shortly after the graveyard i was already feeling 'light headed' when ben called for another drink... so this time i choose the B52.. in tribute to the great bomber... it was a short more than a cocktail.. but i was just as great.
we moved from the rainforest to silva's for a lil supper... ahh.. naan.. even when i'm high it taste good... finished off the night with some pool.. and that was it! the night i would call the slightly delayed celebration of my birthday.

signing off,
JOSH!

We sing and we dance, to our black heart romance...

2006-04-18T14:15:00.000+08:00

ALUUU!!! happy birthday to ME!!! woot!! yes people, as sad as it may sound, Joshua is now officially seventeen.. *how does it feel being older?* owh, pretty much the same.. the beard's a bit longer though..the voice a lil harsher than usual.. but besides that, still the same ol' person I was yesterday. *well, what did you do for ur birthday?* owh absolutely nothing! so far at least.. well i woke up in the morn at about 8.. had breakie-fast.. went online and to my horror, bluserver is down.. so i just surfed around for a while.. then went back to sleep at bout 10.. got up again at 12.30.. went out for lunch with family.. now back here.. isn't that just THE most fun you could have??? blueserver is still down, so i decided to do some reading! opened up 'The Call of Cthulhu' and here i shall remain for the best part of today.. lucky me. i WAS thinking of going to asia cafe.. play some pool.. but the rain kindly advised me against it... =)

signing off,
JOSH!

there's a full moon outside, what are you doing here??

2006-04-12T22:19:00.000+08:00

halo halo one and all, i'm back! ok, lets get straight to the point.. i just wanted to keep the world updated on the happenings in josh's life.. so here it goes... my birthday is in 6 days! i'll finally be out of my ever so sweet sixteen.. and take the giant leap to 17.. i'll be able to get my license then.. yay! ok.. besides that, easter is coming! yeap, its the peak of the christian religion.. its the one that started it all... n its the occasion that carries on 2000 years later.... celebrated still, by the faithfulls.. with just as much passion as our brothers before us... so thats great. it also happens to mark the end of lent.. and my vegetarian diet.. =).Diphthong went jamming today... which was totally awesome!!.. yep, all the nicest things are happening... and so quickly! and yet i'm able to find reason to sigh... it may be my plain negativity or something... but i cant stop thinking bout leaving subang, yes i said leaving subang.. i got into MMU, for those wondering, and i'll be off to melaka in a few weeks.. early june to be exact... i really love this place.. its my home.. where i live and where all my ppl are too.. i've got to leave all that.. for wat?.. for a dumb degree.. sometimes i think it isnt worth it..but oh well, a monn gotta do what a monn gotta do... to add to that, i feel bad.. cuz twice yue asked to go out.. n the first time i din see the msg till after it was already too late.. n then again she asked when i already had plans for the day(today)...sorry ya...
damn i'm getting so emo... stop my breathing and slit my throat.. i must be EMO!

signing off,
JOSH!

What went on in your head? Did you talk to the dead?

2006-04-06T01:09:00.000+08:00

yellow! i'm back! once again... haha.. suddenly i damn semangat wanna blog.. well cuz i now know.. some ppl do check on it.. :) thx... appreciate it..

anyway.. back to the matter at hand. the topic of today's blog. Well for today, i thought of doing a short list of interesting(or at least considered so by me) facts about Josh! so.. here it goes!

Joshua spends more than half of his 'awake' time in front of the pc.(ever since he became unemployed that is)

Joshua likes the colours green, red and black.

Joshua has a bent tail bone(coxyx) froma fall he had when a friend played the ol' 'pull the chair' prank. (some friend that was)

Joshua was a chronic asthmatic as a kid and payed frequent visits to the hospital. (which included plenty of admissions)

Joshua owns 3 guitars, a 12 watt amp and a mega distortion pedal.

Joshua has names for all 3 of his guitars, and out of which, one is a guy.

Joshua has a dog named 'L' who he occasionally calls 'monkey' and 'cat'.

Joshua enjoys walking, especially round lots of greens.

Joshua finds ppl like rose mcgowan, kelly clarkson, jewel and amy lee attractive. He also feels the general population of society has gotten its views of beauty totally haywire.

Joshua once failed an english exam.

Joshua gets very aggitated if he stays at home for long stretches at a time.

Joshua has a great disliking of small things, small cars, small guitars, small handphones, etc.

Joshua finds watching movies completely pointless if not done in the company of loved ones.

Joshua once scored 180 for an IQ test which had a maximum score of 180.

Joshua loves his friends, family and God a whole lot more than he choses to show. All in the interest of maintaining his image.

Joshua thinks the naan at Silva's is a gift from above.

Joshua has the tendency to hate things.

Joshua is only 16 years old.

Joshua once thought if u ate too much vegetables, your shit will eventually turn green.

Joshua spent the last hour and a half coming up with all this.

signing off,
JOSH!

To the window... to the wall.. till the sweat drip from my balls... skeet skeet

2006-04-03T23:48:00.000+08:00

everyday i sit in front of this thing and everyday i feel so sick of myself... but i love everyday of my life... : ) its very hard to explain... i'm not the kinda guy to stay at home.. i'm an outside man... i cant stand staying at home for long periods of time.. thats y i kinda feel like i'm in hell now... but looking at how its for my school going ppl... i'd rather burn in my hell than in theirs... on the other hand.. i envy the whole lot.. they have some sorta social life.. at least... my interaction with society has now been minimized to the internet and church on the weekends... hahaha... the saddest of lives... but i'm loving every minute of it....
suzanne says i should make the most out these bummin days that i have.. 'they wont come again' ... well wat she says is tru la in a way.. soon i'll be off to college.. then its studies for another five years.. upon completing my degree.. i will most probably start working for a few years.. then carry on to pursue my masters and maybe phd.. i'll slot in 'starting a family' somewhere in there as well.. before 28 la i hope... then its off to working for the family for the rest of my days.... well at least till i retire... only then will i get to bum around like what i'm doin now... wow... that's like a loooong 50 odd years from now....
i love my life, but i do hate it at times as well la.. ok la, i'll settle at bittersweet... much better.

signing off,
JOSH!

westward leading.. still proceeding... guide us by holy light..

2006-03-26T22:52:00.000+08:00

halo! i'm back!.. yes i know, i know, i have been neglecting this poor page for a very very long time... i have been sort of dry on the topics in recent days.. i still dont got no interesting topics to write about.. but i just wanna keep this thing updated la.. its a nice page.. i like it. ok now, a brief overview of my life for the past month.

quite a bit has happened since my last entry here.. i quit my job at domino's.. yes, i couldn't take it anymore.. so now i'm a full time bummer! and loving it... :).. i got my SPM results.. din do too good actually.. yea pretty disappointed.. 2A's 6B's 2C's... that's some sucky results for ya...anyway that's over with... i've done sending in my applications for uni's and stuff.. yeap finally decided on some good ol' engineering! mechanical to be exact.. i applied to UNITEN and MMU... beautiful places they are... they got the real university campus life feel too... that's all u realy need in a university. hehehe.. :)
been real bored now that i'm unemployed.. the best part of my day is spent in front of the pc.. either surfing the net or playing diablo 2... love that game... i've also been doin a lots of reading now that i'm soo crazily free.. so it's not so bad after all... i love my life..

signing off,
JOSH!

When you look at the sky... the chances are your gonna see the sky

2006-02-15T23:08:00.000+08:00

greetings one and all... once again to the marvelous world of josh!.. it is I ur lovely moderator and main subject of this page. i have come to tell u stories of my life... well yesterday was valentines day.. it was also my dog's birthday!(or so we assume... all we know is he was born in february).. good ol' El is 2 years young already.. how time flies.. ok well back to my day.. it was like any other day actually.. went to work at 10... angie was off so it was even more a torture than it usually is... from the dumb verbiage we use to the irritating customers... its all so stupifying... i had this dumb ass customer who complained because her pizza arrived a bit too early..come on la! isnt tat a good thing?... and another customer who insisted to talk to me everytime he called..(might have been a gay dude)... anyway thankfully i only work 5 hour days... so it ends just as fast as it begins... got back home.. and rushed off to usj 1.. for a friendly game of DotA.. with good friends hazly and gang... played for a couple of hours.. went home to bore myself infront of the pc.. y doesnt anyone come online anymore! i wish i was busy with school as well.. i was so bored so decided to start reading Dante's divine comedy... the english is so complicated la..pening kepala oni.. i think this is the effects of transalation ... well after a while michelle came online.. so it made things better... she was trying to get her blog up and running.. so helped her out a lil.. and then the day was over! which brings us to today! which i dont want to talk about.. so thats it for now isnt it?

signing off,
JOSH!

oh marvelous poetry...

2006-01-21T01:47:00.000+08:00

ok.. i know i havent posted one of these in a loooong time.. well.. i kinda was outta stuff to write about... well now this is here.. and i'll show it to the world:

the moon shine marks day light's end,
and all the child's plays come to end,
we gaze at the same sky,
and yet it starts to make me cry.

i've nvr seen u for so long,
its almost like as though ur gone,
these bitter tears drip so slow,
all under moon light's glow

my friend i'll never forget the face,
and how managed to slow life's pace,
all with the blink of an eye,
u took this heart and made it smile.

those smiles are now all but gone,
i know its time i must go on,
pick this life from where u left,
and to my cries i turn me deaf.

the scent of u lingers here,
again it brings me close to tears,
so now i think its time to say,
goodbye, take care, for u i'll pray,

go on with ur lovely life,
go on n leave n take this knife,
save me from myself, i tease,
save me, save me, save me please..

i dread to see ur lovely face,
i dread i'll once more fall in place,
the place i once was before,
the place i'll never go no more..

and now i find myself again,
in this mess wit none to gain,
trapped in a frameless shot,
forever, and ever, and ever i'll rot.

i know, i know.. its crappy aint it.. well i havent been writting for a loong time.. so i guess u cant expect too much can you... any comments are more than welcome...

signing out,
JOSH!

hahaha!

2006-01-18T23:10:00.000+08:00

i spent the last two or so hours talking utter nonsense wit yuen.. i was bored, so she came up wit this...

Master Planner says:damn boring la

Master Planner says:tell me some interesting story

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:hugh laurie is hot

Master Planner says:thats the best u can come up wit??????

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:um...i dunno... okay okay..hwo about this.. we each take turns writing five words and make into a story k..i start first..

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:the bell started to ring

Master Planner says:and so did the phone

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:but i didn't want to

Master Planner says:finally i was forced to

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:get off my fat ass

Master Planner says:and answer that dumb thing

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:and to my horror, it

Master Planner says:turned into a living chicken

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:that stared at me with

Master Planner says:some kinda lazer beam thingy

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:*mmfttt* that promptly zapped me on

Master Planner says:my ass but thankfully it

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:burned all the fat so

Master Planner says:now it looks so hot

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:and smells kinda funky like

Master Planner says:sampah juice from the rubbish

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:(wth)... that was left outside KFC

Master Planner says: ... on that warm summer's day

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:heheheh... that smells of hugh's cologne.. *giggle*

Master Planner says:sensual, sexay, manly.. those were

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:the smells of yesterday, but

Master Planner says:now all blown to the

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:chicken house where evil lies

Master Planner says:twas there where i met

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:camen eletra collecting eggs in

Master Planner says:a two piece swimsuit and

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:a big sack with the

Master Planner says:letter 'L' on it. like

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:LOVE as in ashlee's song

Master Planner says:and LAME as in us..

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:so bad!

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:but bakc to carmen who

Master Planner says:*sory, it just came out*... got sick of picking eggs

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:and looked at me and

Master Planner says:asked me if i've ever

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:played an egg pickign game

Master Planner says:which i obviously havent so

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:she told me to take

Master Planner says:a blue pair of shoes

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:and tie the shoelaces together

Master Planner says:and throw them as far

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:as possible over the chickens

Master Planner says:but make sure not to

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:hit the hugh laurie poster

Master Planner says:-_-... which hung right by the

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:huge jacuzzi in the backyard

Master Planner says:where mr.monkey and mr.elephant lay

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:eatign grapes and figs with

Master Planner says:House who was trying to

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:catch yuen's eye with his

Master Planner says:.....

Master Planner says:trusty eye catching device he

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:waved his cane and beckoned

Master Planner says:but unfortunately she ignored him

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:and jumped into the jacuzzi

Master Planner says:sadly.. she overshot and landed

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:in his waiting arms and

Master Planner says:which broke at the impact

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:........... so she took out her anger

Master Planner says:on the monkey and elephant

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:which stampeded on joshua and

Master Planner says:missed him by a mile

Yuen ~ bowtie love at www.uncensoredobsessions.blogspot.com says:so yuen went to sleep

.... hahaha... ah.. the junk the human mind can come up wit... creativity at its best... oh btw.. thx yuen.. for the boredom cure... hahaha... that's all for now..

signing off,
JOSH!

sometimes i'm just a BIT too bored... dont even bother reading this crap

2006-01-09T04:04:00.000+08:00

he just stood there, as he did every morning, staring aimlessly at the crimson light breaking through the infinite depth of night, or as some say it's brother; for as the cycle goes, without light there can be no shadow and without shadow there can be no darkness and without darkness there can be no light. hand in hand their fickle minds control the world and all it's inhabitants. All the more this made Joshua wonder, as he gazed at the horizon as the orange blaze of day took over the waning dark of night. It was only during this time could he get his mind to think; to get it to think of how and why and where did all this come from. for you see, Joshua long proved helpless against the wild plague of laze, and it was only at day's break did he get his mind back. it was, as he put it, "twas like my mind was being washed clean by the light, revitalized and rejuvenated; as how the light takes the night away, it takes my ill being as well!". sadly, his rebirth of intelligence, which he repeated every morning, could only last a mere forty five minutes. Forty five minutes of the clearest, deep insight ever thought of. And then, none. As hard as he tried, as strong his spirit could get, in not more than forty five minutes, the overpowering claws of procrastination gets its iron grip on him once again. how the world wept, even the greatest mind of all was not without weakness. And every morning the world would wait, hoping for the day that his weakness shall be no more..... and still they wait.

Ooh yessSS!!!

2005-12-21T00:58:00.000+08:00

u know i was looking through my blog just now.. and i realised.. 5 pics isnt enough!?.. i felt the ppl want more of josh, dont they?.. if its more they want.. its more they'll get!

haha.. now from the top!.. first up.. is diphthong playing acoustic!.. next is the ever loving friends.. followed by me in my maharaja jippa..hehe... finally its me n jess' scalp.... if u wanna see more of me.. well.. i dont have THAT many pictures.. sorry...

signing out,

JOSH!

hey! its my 25th entry!! woohoo!!!.. thats like.. a quarter of a hundred!!

2005-12-20T13:49:00.000+08:00

halooo.. one and all.. it is I... the royal and most noble.. king of this poor,grief-stricken,forgotten land which i call my blog...please.. come in.. have a cup of air.. n listen to my tales of old... they may just bore u to death.. but wat the heck.. ur bored enough to come here... today i shall tell the tale of boredom.. which has sadly plagued my lands once again... this time, it attacks in such a great scale.. that even my last line defences broken in seconds..how sad, to think, the once fun filled lands of josh.. are now ill wit boredom.. hohoho! but never fret! the time of reckoning has arrived!... for the last time this year.. josh shall rise from the ashes like a phoenix.. burning.. brighter and more lively than ever before.. all battle stations shall be manned.. all weapons sharpened.. all food eaten.. we shall run into battle.. wit our heads held up high... screaming the cry of freedom! hohoho... a great battle it shall be.. when the blood spills.. when the fire burns.. i promise!.. the cold bite of boredom.. shall no longer haunt us.. not now, not ever!... so come with me!.. we shall make this victory ours! onward! for freedom!!!!! AAARRRRGGGHHH!!!!!!

pictures galore!

2005-12-18T02:38:00.000+08:00

once again, i salute all... for taking the time to visit this poor excuse of a web journal.... today, i'll be posting pictures!.. on special request from michelle.. :D.. enjoy!

this is me!

this is me and the rest of DIPHTHONG....

these are the great people in my life.. my friends.. of course there's more..

the ladies.... sorry guys.. no pics of ya'll...

and of course.. the girl who wanted to see this in the first place..

well thats all the pics for this time... when i get nicer ones.. i'll put it up i guess.. thats it from me today...

signing off,

JOSH!

Deoxyriboneucliec acid

2005-12-16T02:09:00.000+08:00

greetings one and all... it is I.. once again to fill that lovely computer screen of urs with nonsense and junk of the highest quality... today was a very hippening day i might say.. i went, for the first time, to times square.. lovely place.. with a very lovely theme park.. went there with jess,ness and sammy...that was one hell of an outing...had loads of fun..but now it all seems to be vanishing.. as i return to reality... this shitty feeling comes wit it...what shitty feeling?.. I MISS MY FRIENDS!!!.. it suddenly hit me so hard.. when the other day yue msg-ed me.. she wanted to have dinner and i couldnt...suddenly, there the shit was!... i havent seen her in ages.. so many others as well.... and knowing that i wont be seeing some of them.. for the rest of my life.... this has to be just about the crappiest i've felt in a very very very long time..... oh well at least i went on an outing that took all that shit away for a while... slight relief...hehehe..DNA mixer rocks!..nigga its spinning,its spinning..... anyway.. i shall end this at here for today... i MUST be emo man... writing bout my feelings..EW!...

signing off,
JOSH!

finally, the josh has come back to blogtown... alive n kicking

2005-12-12T03:58:00.000+08:00

Yo Yo Yo!! yes I'm back. once againto my beloved blog page.. which i shamefully cast aside for so long... but never fear.. i have returned.. bigger and better than ever before... so we shall start wit today...morning was like any other usual sunday.. got up.. went for mass.. came back.. played half life 1.. went online.. chat.. played guitar... yup the everyday boring life... but it was the night which made the whole day worth living.. my wonderful friends and I went to have dinner at pyramid in conjunction wit Yi Wern's birthday.. Adrian's girlfriend.. who today, for the first time, i met... she seems like a nice girl.. well anyway.. me n andre went there a little late.. cuz he had to have dinner at home first...so when we reached there, they had already ordered food and were almost done... no matter... cuz we had a long night a head of us.. the time at then was only 8+.. while we were plannig to stay there for the MU game.. which at tat time we thought was at 11.we went to this place rainforest.. which was just about the shittiest place i've been to.. cuz not only was the food n drinks crappy... it was costly as well.. and to add to tat, we found out tat the game was not at 11 but at 12.. so waiting was the name of the game..we watched ice hockey for a while.. n then went off to sugumaran's.. the mamak wit the projector tv..watched the crappy MU game.. which they drew.. but on a brighter note.. we got to eat some tandoori n naan.. plus have some bru coffee.. which made it all a little more bearable... anyway.. i dont know y anyone would ever even bother about wat happens in my life..so i guess i should end my life stories now...lets just hope future post arent like this, shall we? hehehe

signing off,
JOSH!

if you stare at the sun for a very very long time.. you're most probably gonna go blind.

2005-11-06T18:19:00.000+08:00

u know, as they day count on, i've delved deeper and deeper into the whole 'pointless titles' thing.. i think it's leaves readers completely unprepared for what they're gonna read and thus creates a minor state of curiosity and tension to a certain extent.. it may be the cause of the lack of readers of my page or it might even be the cause of my page even having readers in the first place... it all depends on how you look at it.. the best way is to not look at it at all. therefore, i shall no longer speak of it... for this post at least.
ok, so moving on to my actual post. my name is still Joshua, i'm still sixteen, i'm still sane.. for the time being at least... enough of the recap. for the rest you can kindly contact me at my phone number, which i'll conviniently leave out. ok so, nothing much has happened since i last posted, exams are drawing even closer, i am trying to study even harder.. but to no avail so far. funny how i find my self here, when the rest of the form five population of this small country is most probably staring at a book.... i completed the warcraft 3 reign of chaos camplaign recently.. it was awesome.. brilliant campaign.. one of the few i actually had the drive to finish.. most of them usually bore me out halfway through... so now i moved on to the frozen throne campaing... which is proving to be quite a task.. but entertaining nonetheless... ut dont any of u worry... i'm not playing it 24/7.. only when i get tired of studying.. which apparently happens very often...especially today, cuz i was doing add maths... anyway, i think i've wasted enough time on this piece of junk for today.... so till the next time, bye!

signing off,
JOSH!

Grab a knife, aim it directly at your heart, and pull!

2005-10-30T00:15:00.000+08:00

What do u call a person who knows the answers, has the ability to answer them, yet choses not to answer all in the effort to suffer because his idea of a perfect life is a one with both the good and the bad and he feels that his life isn't gettin enough of the bad? oh yes, psycho! WHAT THE HELL AM I TALKIN ABOUT??? u might ask.. well i wont answer. go figure that out yourself dumbass...hehe...i havent been updating this often enough.. been pretty caught up with stuff i guess.. for one, my exams are comin, my schooling life has just ended, my sunday school life ended recently as well... my social life is comin to an end.. i just have a feelin... so havent had the time nor interest to keep this thingy up-to-date.. yes, i was out of ideas to write about...ok so, nothing much has changed, i'm still the same ol' joshua i guess... i got a new phone! well actually not exactly new, a hand-me-down from my bro as he got a new phone. its kinda cool.. comes wit a acmera n stuff.. so i have been on a photo taking spree.. i realised its quite fun to take pictures.. i kinda like it.. this picture here is one i like a lot... its a picture of the sun settin from my lovely 'padang bukit'...

has a kinda magical feel to it doesnt it?
i like it... i like it a lot... and remember kids, this was all taken from a phone! hahaha

signing off,
JOSH!

help! help! help!

2005-10-16T00:23:00.000+08:00

HELP!!!!!! ini tak boleh!!! hahaha... my freaking exams comin closer, n i just started a warcraft campaign!! wats wrong wit me!!!... anyway, i just posted this to make the shortest post i've ever made... so here it is!

Hi, i'm pretty bored.... but a bit less on the bored!

2005-10-06T01:23:00.000+08:00

Not much to be done nowadays. Since of course, it's the holidays.. been trying my best to study these past few days.. not much has happened though. so once again, i find solace in this load of monkey crap. This reminded of the times when people could claim sanctuary in a cathedral.. away from all laws whatsoever.. dont know why they burnt that rule..
today i would like to let everyone know( ok, just the people who read this) a little something bout myself..well i'm not too sure what that something is, but i'll figure it out.... ok i got one! it just hit me just now, we are what we choose to be.. not 'i was born like this', or 'that's just the way i am'... thats a load of bullshit. oK! back to the thing about me.. all ME! well for quite sometime now, i have thought myself to be naturally very paled emotioned... it takes a lot to get me to feel down.. i take a lot of things very easily.. especially my feelings. i always assumed they were not there anymore, that my overwhelming joy eternally dispelled the despair in me... but then i realised just now... i was not born like this. i wasnt always so stone hearted. i HAD emotions, and they were real! but recently, all i've become is a two dimentional tormented piece of happy meat.
now i know... i choose to be this way. my constant neglect of my own despair has led to it becoming none! All because i was too ashamed to show it to the world.. because i wanted to preserve my view of a hakuna matata life. i wanted to always be the tough one. the one who never cried, never felt down and could always be there for the poor disheartened, emotionally alive people. and now, all i've made myself into is.. a wretch of a joyful person! sounds pretty contradicting doesnt it? haha... well just imagine, feeling like crap inside and not being able to show it.. not being able to even accept the emotions running through you veins... ah.. all this i face alone...

trapped in this mind of my own,
i now reap now what i have sown,
thorned bushes are all i got,
wrapped around these fragile thoughts,

forever and now in hell i'll rot.

Get a life.... i heard they have a couple of good ones on E-bay

2005-10-04T20:47:00.000+08:00

Hahaha... some real crappy stuff i have on this page. but its such a real thing this is.. my blog... honest uncensored thouhgts of the purest kind all from the mind of ME! this time around i'll be expressing my views on suicidal teens.. hahahha... this all started on monday night.. there was a documentary on the columbine high massacare.. well for those who dont know wat the hell i'm talking about, on the 20th of April 1999, two high school students went bonkers and shot fellow students and teachers in school.. killed 13 n hurt a whole lot more before killing themselves.. if u want to know about this in a deeper manner...try wikipedia, my trusted online encyclopedia... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Columbine_High_School_massacre... u can find almost anything and everything about the shooting there. ok anyway, back to my topic of the day, suicidal teens. the numbers been growing at such an alarming rate and yet some poeple take it as a joke when someone says they wanna end their life.. but what tickles my curiosity even more is, what brings a person to a such a state.. to feel their life is meaningless enough to throw it away.. countless poems(even by me), songs,articles and books have been written about this tragedy that plagues societies of youths everywhere... one in particular that i would like to point out is a song by cradle of filth entitled, suicide and other comforts. from the name itself u can deduct what sorta theme it carries. at first i too had that sorta impression about the song. that it was about a dumbass who was tired of his crappy life so he ended it... but once i read the lyrics and got into the song.. i realised it was far deeper... for those who wanna experience this first hand, go download the song n read this http://www.songmeanings.net/lyric.php?lid=64480... you'll get what i'm tryin to say.. it sings of a guy... who suffers eternally from the death of his beloved.. no matter how much he tries... he cant forget her.. and finally he decides to join her in death.... sounds kinda stupid doesnt it? but as stupid as it seems it opened my eyes wide open.. to this suicide stuff... not that these poeple choose to kill themselves.. but in a way.. these poeple are pushed into a corner wit no humanly possible escape... but one, death. loss of loved ones, being castaways of society, being ridiculed to the point of insanity, to be all alone( not physically) with not a single soul to consider them worthy of companionship... these and so much more... are all what fuels this burning desire to end their lives.. and some even take a few others with them... u can never really blame a person for doing such a stupid thing... for theirs always an exterior cause to it or in some cases, a lack of external stimulation... these people can be helped.. if only society wasnt the way it is... if it wasnt so discriminating... we would have more youths alive in the world.. and yet i dont feel remorse for these poor things.. these suicidal cases... for one they help open the eyes of the world to these prblems faced by youths all around the world... they also remind us how fragile a teenage mind can be... a little problem and revert to suicide... also reminds us how easily these maturing mind are influenced... by music, by television, by games... after all this contemplating suicide.. and even through all the stuff i've gone through.. i realise, i would never take my life away.. nor another's... but if death were to come looking for me.. i would freely embrace it with open arms.. besides, whats there to lose?

signing off,
JOSH!

live life as it was supposed to be lived!!!

2005-10-02T23:06:00.000+08:00

The river flows it never end,
with it, life rides the bends,
on such a trip can we say?,
why don't we just stop for a day?.
and yet why not his prayers come true,
to have a day, no, make it two,
while all the rest hurrily toil,
we smell the grass and lie on soil.

------------------------------------------

nurtured thorns grasp so tight,
on the tortured soul they bite,
tear and mend, tear and mend,
the mirrored pain will never end.

------------------------------------------

silence speaks the world for me,
murky visions none i see,
echoed thoughts all i hear,
on all none i hold so dear.

what is life with a mind,
when all the rest so hard to find,
locked up to what i touch,
and what i feel, i love so much.

my loneliness in what i feel,
this fragile mind begins to peel,
swallowed by an empty heart,
return to He in heaven who art.

Here I am.. once again

2005-10-01T18:55:00.000+08:00

Itu dia.. Joshua!! hahaha... i dont even know y i'm still keeping this load of crap running... once again.. i'm backed up to a wall of boredom... with only one escape...BLOG!.(Nooooo!!!) ...sorry for the drama.. it just makes things more interesting,doesnt it? well its the holidays now... got a whole week off... not much of a holiday, since right after it we have exams... well at least we're given sometime off to get goin wit our books... but that doesnt quite seem to be the case with this young man.. u see.. i have a long history of procrastination.. we go way back.. since the days of primary school... just a few days ago me and a group of friends were having a chat on how we used to get screwed by our teacher in school and all the funny punishments we got... i remember once in standard 5... my teacher, Pn.Chia( the most irritaiting teacher in the history of education) wasnt to happy wit the state of my books..empty... she in her fitful rage threw my book out of the class... at that exact same time.. my mother( who came to visit my sis who was still in standard 1) was pasing by on her way back home.. so then, all hell broke loose.. Pn.Chia knowing my mother pretty well called her in and gave her a brief summary of my dilligence in homework doing.. and boy couldnt she have been more pleased.. really, couldnt she?... i honestly thought that was the end for me.. no go.. goner,kantoi, gg, call it wat ever u want...she just kept quite listening attentively to the words of my wonderful teacher... then she left!.. just like that i thought my term in hell was over.... but oh how wrong i was...upon reaching home(i used to go by bus), i saw the expression on my mothers face.. and i knew, my hell hasnt even begun.... till this day that memory stays.. vivid as the screen before me.. it used to haunt me... but now it has become a laugh.. how i wished it was at then, a laugh.. but i guess this is all life experience.. but arent we suppose to learn from our mistakes?.. i'm still as lazy as ever.. i dont do my homework... well i guess somethings dont change..

Signing off,
JOSH!

The great farewell dinner...

2005-09-24T11:15:00.000+08:00

yoyoyo! heyo everybody once again, it is I, ur host blogger at the helm...well today i'm gonna be talkin bout the MPT5 which was yesterday. well the days for me began mych earlier.. went out for breaskfast wit parents n sis... then had the God-forsaken rehearsals.. which took close to 5 hours... then of course there's the gettin ready n stuff.. the event itself was pretty un-eventful.. i had to make my own fun... was pratically dancing the whole night through... jumpin from table to table lookin for ppl...finally i took a couple of photos of myself.. i dont have much of those...then of course there was Diphthongs performance... it didnt go excatly as we planned... but it still was one hell of a performance... thx for all the support ppl...and then.. it was over... just like tat..as i said before.. it wasnt as eventful as i hoped it to be... for me at least...but it was a great night nonetheless... i could see most of the ppl were havin their fun dressing up drowning themselves in make-up... while i was in pure black.. as always..(its an expression of self)... so that was that!... a night which cost me in total 80 bucks(60 bucks ticket, 20 bucks strings).. but was worth a whole lot more than that...

Do angels really deserve to die??

2005-09-21T21:00:00.000+08:00

greetings poeple of the world.. it's me.. yes, not some super star.. just loud YOUNG josh...well today will be a very contemplative edition of the marvelous world of josh... two days from today... my band, diphthong will be performing for our school's majlis perpisahan tingkatan lima(MPT5).. and in our set of four songs.. we will be playing 'chop suey' by system of a down..so thats where my woes begin.. well u see.. for the past year or so.. i've been wondering over time.. what does this song mean??... i've been searching all over the net for it.. but i ended up wit about twenty different interpretations... some even told me to just take the song at face value... but i cant!... my over analytical personallity is at its best when it comes to music.. i NEED to get what the writer is tryin to say with a song.. being a writer myself.. it's a must..so back to the song...chop suey... from the tittle.. which is a kinda american chinese mix dish..so much from getting anything from the tittle... well then to the lyrics.. well for those who havent heard chop suey b4... here they are:

Wake up,
Grab a brush and put a little (makeup),
Grab a brush and put a little,
Hide the scars to fade away the (shakeup)
Hide the scars to fade away the,
Why'd you leave the keys upon the table?
Here you go create another fable

You wanted to,
Grab a brush and put a little makeup,
You wanted to,
Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup,
You wanted to,
Why'd you leave the keys upon the table,
You wanted to,
I don't think you trust,
In, my, self righteous suicide,
I, cry, when angels deserve to die, Die,

Wake up,
Grab a brush and put a little (makeup),
Grab a brush and put a little,
Hide the scars to fade away the (shakeup)
Hide the scars to fade away the,
Why'd you leave the keys upon the table?
Here you go create another fable
You wanted to,
Grab a brush and put a little makeup,
You wanted to,
Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup,
You wanted to,
Why'd you leave the keys upon the table,
You wanted to,

I don't think you trust,
In, my, self righteous suicide,
I, cry, when angels deserve to die
In my, self righteous suicide,
I, cry, when angels deserve to die

Father/Father/Father/FatherFather/
Into your hands/I/commend my spirit,
Father, into your hands,
Why have you forsaken me,
In your eyes forsaken me,
In your thoughts forsaken me,
In your heart forsaken, me oh,
Trust in my self righteous suicide,
I, cry, when angels deserve to die,
In my self righteous suicide,
I, cry, when angels deserve to die.

..... i'm still blur... what does it mean!.. well i kinda got a interpretation which i think is the most accurate one... its actually about religion.. if u dont know.. the 'father into ur hands i commend my spirit' is actually the last words Jesus said before he died on the cross...its about how christianity has been blurred my so many ppl... its begining to lose its true message...read it properly... its very true.... so.. for the time being.. this will be my interpretation.. or at least wat i assume the meaning of the song is... so for the rest of u purist who believe otherwise... keep it to urselves.. i'd rather not hear about it...

signing off,
JOSH!

all's well in the world of josh.. oh yea, boss, ju, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

2005-09-17T02:00:00.000+08:00

As referring to the title above.. i would like to wish two of my VERY VERY good friends a VERY VERY happy B'day!!! first.. boss, Amir Farhan, train, diablo call him what u want...n yes i will... his birthday was two days ago.. i would like to say how much i enjoy hanging out wit him.. not just the kutuk-ing.. but just when the Gin and Juice Mafia is together.. its magic... and all the times we did mischieve in school... memories... hahaha...and then the other... Ju-Ju, Julien, aunty, apa-apa la... her birthday party was today.. and i'm sure she had a blast.. thats all that matters.. of course, i had one hell of a great time... but seeing her surprised face when we got her the cake n all... thats a good feeling.. nothing brings me more joy then bringing joy to my friends.. n i think we brought quite a lot of joy into her life today.. haha..well she deserves it anyway.. she has done a lot in my life that i dont think she notices.. all those chats online.. all the laughs we have about 'basically' everything... those things are things that even time can't take away.... memories.. plus we keep making new ones.. so i dont think it'll be ending anytime soon...so here's to Boss, Ju.. I love u guys.. and happy birthday!!!!( hiphop non stop! hiphop non stop!)

When the wall of boredom is right in your face..

2005-09-13T19:28:00.000+08:00

hey! oh all my loyal and avid readers.. if there are any.. well to day i found out there is!.. at least one la..my very good friend Tan Yue Mei... just today she told me she reads my blog often.. so for her entertainment.. i shall publish a post today...well today was a very sleepy-ing day... was probably sleeping three thirds of the day.. during physic exam, during moral exam, almost during tuition(was trying my outmost best to stay awake).. and even now i feel like sleeping... besides the sleeping, today was a very OK day.. i know i'm gonna fail my moral.. but thats the least of my worries..its my sciences i'm worried about... Pn Shanta already said i did very badly for my bio... but it all good! it's just the trials anyway.. still got time la.. i guess.. but very little time la..but time is time none-the-less... on the other hand, trials are almost over! just one more day to go!.. then i can fully concentrate on the coming big one... but before that there is the MPT5... have to get ready for performing n all... that'll help me chill out a bit la i hope... i hope la.. anyway.. thats my life for the time being... oh ya.. i also wrote another poem today!. here here, i'll let u have a read....

With a heavy sigh,
i try to carry life on by,
but these palisades of fear,
they have kept me near,
near to pain i try to abstain,
but deepened roots still remain,
so here i try to find the end,
a knife strikes with such bitter blend,
with flowing blood my life transcends...

haha! quite cekap huh?.. did it in the car while coming back from tuition.. i think its very nice.. wat do u think?.. tell me please.. i would really like to know.. bout this or any other poem on this boring page.... just add a coment.. that's all for now...

signing off,
JOSH!

When life brings you to a bore...

2005-09-09T21:06:00.000+08:00

hello and greetings everyone! Joshua here once again, to bring you yet another episode of his marvelous and crappy life...haha.. well nothing much has happened.. trials have been going on.. its almost over.. just two more days!! YAY!.. then of course, DOTA! haha.. for a few days la.. then its back to studying.. SPM is coming closer.. and i dont seem to be getting anymore prepared.. i think it's finally dawning on me.. i really should start getting serious.. haha.. u dont know what sorts of miracles Joshua can perform when he gets serious.. its amazing.. but i lazy la wanna get serious..thats the whole freaking problem with me.. just too(not one, not three.. but too) lazy... i think i'm about THE laziest being that has ever tracked this beautiful earth... sadly... anyway, enough of the laziness... i'm getting a whole lot healthier.. no more fevers or flu... now all thats left is the irritating cough.. but thats also slowly fading away.. so all in all.. things are looking brighter.. i can taste again.. kinda cool being able to taste real sensations once again..just makes me think bout that guy in 'one' by metallica.. couldnt feel any sense at all.. no sight,sound, touch, taste and smell... how sad... not being able to feel pleasure or pain... you are just reduced to being trapped in your own mind... no way to contact the outside world.. i'd much rather die than live like that.. MUCH rather die... well anyway, its a beautiful songs that is.. 'one'.. one of my favourites of all time.. never get sick of it...
i think i've said enough today... BYE!

Of all the great days...

2005-09-03T23:38:00.000+08:00

Greetings fellow life less people... u have just reached about THE most boring page u'll ever have the pleasure of reading.. haha.. so! today was just one of those days la...when everything u do.. just doesnt end up THAT good.. well my day started at about 9 when i got up.. n straight sat in front of this darn machine... until about 11.30 when i had to get goin.. cuz i was meetin michelle in the library for some studying.. so my parents dropped me off at the junction and went off to PJ (my dad had some charity car wash thingy in the PJ club A & W).. so i walked over to the library and to my surprise.. it was CLOSED! not open.. not goin to open... but closed! it seems it just implemented its new rule of being closed on the 1st and 3rd saturday of the month... YES!! of all the great things to happen to me... so i informed mich bout the great condition of the library and began my journey back home... yes.. i walked.. in the midday sun.. from tat crapped up library to my home in the other end of USJ... so i walked.. n walked.. n walked... n after about half an hour.. i reached the 'comforts' of my home.. or so i thought...when i reached home.. i realised tat my journey had taken it's toll on me.. my head was aching to God knows which degree of hell... my throat was sore.. i was coughing my lungs out..n best of all i had a slight incerase in body temperature..( for those illiterates.. it's called a fever).. a fever.. me, joshua, getting a fever... that hasnt happened to me in ages!.. i take pride in my superior heath conditions.. i go on an average.. about five times a year to a doctor... yes.. i believed i was somewhat immortal in these areas.. but now.. i was as sick as anything!.. a bit sad rite?.. to add to that matter.. i had a DOTA metting in USJ 1 tat evening.. whihc was eventually cancelled cuz of poor attendance.. that just made things worse!.. and to top it all off... i had to go to assumption for mass... not that i have anything against assumption.. but i just prefer to be in the comforts of my own parish when praying n sorts.. plus it was very stuffy over there.. so my health conditions would just make tat all the more bearable.. haha..after mass n dinner.. i came home n went straight to sleep... n just got up a few minutes ago.. n now cant get back to sleep.. haha.. wat a day huh?.. well for others this might seems like any other day but for me... these small things seem to just irritate me.. haha... quite interesting huh? the life i lead..

On the verdant plain it stands,
A memory of another man,
How it tries to fade away,
That memory of death will stay,
And yet in ways a memory,
Is good it never lets me be,
For when a memory begins to fade,
The life and death the man made,
would go to waste, and waste away,
For this it should, a memory stay.

Isn't this just the best way to burn un-wanted time??

2005-08-28T00:38:00.000+08:00

i never knew i had un-wanted time... but anways! HAI!! Joshua back here again.. with another edition of his 'sleeping pill' blog! haha.. well the excitement of being a genius has quite died out already.. but it still is a bit hard to take in... ISCORED180ONAIQTEST!! ok enough of the bragging... i was walking around just now in the evening.. doin some thinking.. and i stumble upon a stone.. it was a river rock.. very rarely seen around here..well cuz there's no river.. but its beautiful.. extremely smooth.. from the constant friction against the currents.. yet quite square-ish in shape.. i picked it up.. and took it along on my journey around the housing area.. when suddenly the idea came up like a light lighting up my mind!..i'll give it away! not to anyone but to Michelle!.. well in case ur wonderin y Michelle of all ppl.. i shall clear it up.. well u see... ever since my leg got injured.. i have felt immensely in debt to her.. cuz all throughout my recooperation days.. she was always there.. talkin care of me.. helpin me all around school.. and helpin me carry all my stuff.. pack it up.. helpin me up the stairs.. and down.. and up again... but most of all for keepin me company... i was also not the best patient to take care of... she took care of me be it how much i insulted her..( n i did quite a bit).. all of it was in the interest of fun.. but i think it struck a few of her nerves... VERY SORRY... well this rock shall be a token.. to watever she wants it to be.... now i also would like to clear up... she wasnt the ONLY one to help me around.. all my other friends too... all helped me greatly.. (i'll find ways to pay u guys back soon!).. but she kinda did the better of the work.... so this blog post is dedicated to her! haha Michelle! u have a whole post dedicated to u.. one in a million! Thanks!!

Signing off,
JOSH!

oh happy day!!! YEAH!

2005-08-23T21:18:00.000+08:00

Hallo!! its me! joshua. n do i have a story for u.... it all started about two weeks ago.. my mom saw a advertisement in the papers about the malaysian mensa association n they were havin an iq test.. it was on that comin saturday. so, i decided to go for it.. it was a 40 minute test.. consists of 36 questions..all picture based.. no words watsoever..all just logic questions.. the marking scale was from 1-180 and the average iq was about 100-110.. so i sat for the test..(it was awfully tough).. n just now.. as i was goin for tuition..i got a letter from mensa... it was the results... as i was in a rush i decided to open it in the car.... so as i opened that fated envelope.. my hands began to sweat.. as so happens whenever i get nervous( which is not very often mind u)... so i opened the letter and this is wat it read..
"Congratulations! It is our pleasure to infrom you that you have obtained a test score of 180 on the Ravens Advanced Progressive Matrices Scale. This score places you....."
....I was shocked! stunned!!... i stared at that letter... re-read it again and again.... and everytime it read the same thing.. 180... a perfect score... I scored a perfect score on an iq test... it was my dream ever since forever... and now it was done!... my dream of intelligence was fulfilled.... and now i begin to realise.. it was God... i asked.. n He gave... all of a sudden i feel so stupid to ever have doubted Him... THANK YOU GOD!nn now i not only fulfilled my dream... but got my faith back... it truly is a happy day.

life's too short... we need more tafee pullers!!

2005-08-14T01:37:00.000+08:00

hello there! it's joshua! Again! and today he's in the best mood coming in to a blog since he started this piece of crap. well mostly because i've got some feedback from quite a few ppl bout my blog..... and most of them were positive! ppl seem to actually like my poetry!! well i like it too no doubt about that.. but it kinda worries me... wat if i run out of inspiration? wat if i nvr can write poetry like i used to? well thats y.. i wanna post one my older poems today to compare the older stuff to the newer stuff.... this is one of my best i think.. in my opinion at least... and before u read it.. the names that are mentioned in this poem and all others for that matter.. are all fiction and have nothing watsoever in relation with the real world... most of them are just used to complete the rhyme sequence.. like in this one.. it's the only one i have named so far... actually it named itself more than i... this one.. is entitled

STEPHANIE

she's all alone,
she has no home,
there's no where she can be.

her eyes are dry,
but till she cries,
blood is wat she weeps.

she has no one,
no sound of fun,
she cannot even see.

she tries to find,
but she's lost in mind,
poor, poor, Stephanie...

her hands they tremble,
she can't remember,
how she came to be.

she has one hope,
to hang a rope,
around her neck it seems..

she looks back at days,
and finally says,
"oh, God, please take me!".

she was deaf and blind,
and she lost her mind,
poor, poor, Stephanie...

...... just hits a spot, it does.. to me la at least... kinda makes me feel... one of the few times i actually DO feel... but i think it's a nice poem nonetheless..... and once again.. this has nothing to do with any stephanie U or I know... its purely out of my mind.. and will remain at that.. ok? so, any stephanie's out there.. jangan la terasa.. if u do terasa.. sorry.
that's about all i wanted to do this time.. BYE!

signing off,
JOSH!

Josh! Again!! and Again!!

2005-08-13T16:29:00.000+08:00

Haha! again i find u here. u seem to have even less a life than I... haha but nuff' of that.. we shall continue on this marvelous journey of Josh!.. well as u can clearly see... i'm bored out of my very thick skull... and thats why i'm back here.. typing... complete and utter nonsense.. that's all this is... not some usefull junk that'll help u in life or anything.. just a complete waste of both mine and ur time.. haha.. well i'm kinda short for words at this particular time.. so i thought to myself, 'why don't i add another one of my poems!' and indeed i am.. going to add yet another... haha! HAH!

shadows douse the bright blue sky,
darkness fills us all,
tonight, dear children set to die,
drawn solely to the call,
sweet, warm, mellow voice,
that tempts the hearts of young,
believe in them, it's their choice,
to tie the rope they hung..

and as the elders begin to wake,
from their dreamy sleeps,
the bloody hell they'll have to face,
will haunt them ten graves deep..

yet no one knew of the goings,
that took the village that night,
the sputters of blood, that's all their findings,
left no one without fright.

now the songs of old begin to play,
of lore old ancient it tells,
the beasts that dug the childrens' graves,
were none other than themselves!

freaky isn't it?... i wrote this one during an english exam... or est i think... i'm not sure la... one of those.. eiher way.. boring exam time is the perfect time to write poetry.. as proven by JOSH!

signing out,
JOSH!

I'm bored... are you?

2005-08-06T03:00:00.000+08:00

Haha! here i go again... back to writing nonsense on a page i doubt anyone will ever take a second glance at... it's kinda boring actually... so i can't really blame anyone for that.. but that's just who i am.. boring ol' joshua.. just boring ol' joshua.. nothing more, nothing less.. one thing good i've realised that comes out of writing this blog is i've improve my typing skills tremendously.. well at least some good comes of it.. so it's not a COMPLETE waste of my time la... just a bit.. a BIT...
well.. nothings new in my life... the only things that has changed is, i've started playin DOTA!.. not very good at it though.. get owned even by the computers... but its a nice game nonetheless... its taking up time though.. precious time that i could have spent studying... which i know, even if i didnt play DOTA, i wouldnt do... AHAH!.. try n beat that!
i started reading 'charlie and the chocolate factory' two days ago... but maybe it's because i've already watched the movie or sumtin.. but i don't find it all that interesting... i still think alice was a better book.. but the cartoon was obviously a mockery of it.. couldnt exactly capture the funness of alice.. it missed out a lot of the pointless conversations with all the weirdos in the book.. whihc actually made the book all the more interesting! i still think that book is the best childrens book i've ever read.. and may be the best i will ever read.. it certainly is up there...
my leg is getting better... can almost climb the stairs without limping.. but the skins is peeling off in the most weirdest of ways... it's comin off in sheets in stead of the usual small pieces..i kept one of those sheets.. for memory i suppose... but it kinda tickles my curiousity a little.. i wonder wat it would look like under a microscope... too bad the toy microscope that i have is not working... bored... oh ya... i wrote another poem the other day... its a simple four liner..( cuz i'm too lazy to write anymore than that)... here it goes:

closing wall around they fall,
my mind it never hears the call,
it carries on that twisted lane,
that turns this tortured soul insane.

On the brink of insanity...

2005-07-30T15:51:00.000+08:00

isn't it interesting how one can wreck one's brain by just doing nothing? to be trapped in the jaws of one's own thought.. to search yet don't know what ur searching for and then find an answer which completely sets everything off balance... it's also funny how i seem to be in those numbers... i found myself on this journey to insanity only a few days ago... at first i thought nothing of it.. but as the days wore on.. i began to realize... i'm going insane... i've searched every single health related site and read everything about mental illnesses...( even being mental is not as bad as being insane).. but nothing adds up... i don't know where this road will take me... but i hope it is only a temporary phase... i'm going to church tomorrow.. maybe i'll find something there... it sickens me.. how i never thought of religion as an escape any earlier... only now, when all else has failed me... makes this all the more unbearable...but on the positive side... it gives some new ideas for poetry! like this one i wrote a couple of days ago...

The answer I will never find,
to why i slowly lose my mind,
with every word I wreck my brain,
and by myself i'll go insane....
nothing mends, pain never bends, lest I end...

signing off,
JOSH!

Welcome!... To The Marvelous World of Josh!

2005-07-30T15:32:00.000+08:00

Greetings and Welcome to 'The Marvelous World Of Josh!'

I, as u would have already guessed, am Josh! or more widely known as Joshua Wilson Gasper. and often referred to as punz, josh,PUMPKIN(thx for the reminder Mich), bitch, mommy(yes, MOMMY!), papadam and of course, Master Planner! .I've always hated blogs... they feel so weak, gurly, GAY... and yet, i find myself doin one.. which i'm sure hardly anyone would bother reading. i have mostly yuen to thank for this cuz she's the one who actually suggested it to me. this is supposed to be an 'outlet' according to her... well i guess i'll have to try it out to find out.

i dont know how long this blog will actually last, but i dont u'll see much of me writing my days happenings or stuff like that... unless something really amazing happened! like it rained chocolate!.. i suddenly have a crazy love for chocolate.. that movie.. 'charlie and the chocolate factory'.. it did this to me... made me a chocolate loving freak!... but i loved that movie... so much of fun in it.. just pure, untarnished fun.. the kinda fun that u can only find in the hearts of young ones... a great example of this childish fun, and also one of my favourite books of all times, is the book 'alice in wonderland'. its a book filled wit songs and poems and just so much FUN! i dont think i've ever read a book that made me feel that way ever! i felt like a child all over again.. no worries, no stress, nothing but pure un-ending fun!... Ah... how i wish i could be a child again...

i think i've crapped enough for a first time blog.... so here's to many more of these!

signing out,
JOSH!

Josh! again!

2005-07-30T01:59:00.000+08:00

hey,

it's kinda sad isn't it... blogging twice in the same night...well i'm extremely bored that's why.. can't seem to sleep... anyway, just now.. i came up with the most brilliant of ideas!... in between all my usual crappy blogs, i'll add some of my poems! my self-composed all 100% original Josh poems. well i thought, since i'm dying of boredom rite now... i'll post up the first one!
ok, so before i start putting up my poems, i would like it if NO ONE steals my creations because they are from the purest of minds and please do not spoil them... and also, i have never actually named my poems, so if anyone has an idea of a suitable name for anyone of my poems, pls do drop it in the comments section of the page.. thank you.

now for my first poem,

Can't the world just slow down,
Just stop the spinning, round and round,
Men themselves can't contemplate,
on how their lives were once so great,

They look back at their childhood eyes,
And then begin to realize,
The stones they picked when they were young,
Could build a home; their burning sun,

And still these men march straight on,
Looking for the peace long gone,
They never stop, nor ever take heed,
That what they want is not their need.

that's all for now.. did u like it?.. well it wont make a difference if u liked it or not... its till gonna be there.. haha...

signing off,
JOSH!